Gifts for the Holidays

As a child of five, I remember asking for a set of tinker toys and a pair of boots for Christmas. There is a picture in my family album of having received those two things.  Often giving is a matter of receiving material things we desire.

Some holidays were stretched financially just for necessities. We prepared brightly cut cards or shapes to hang on the tree with a promise for something on each one. “This is good for one pack of gum the next time we go to the grocery store.” “This is good for one uniform for sports.” This is a coupon for the senior trip.” “This travel coupon is good for four free rides to the doctor.” “This is a coupon for the ice festival in Tulsa.”

 Gary Barg, recently offered a couple of e-articles about giving for the holiday season. I have combined some of his with some of my own. Recently we needed EMSA for a life threatening event. The readily available documents that we needed to be readily available were an Advanced Directive (Living Will) and Durable Power of Attorney including health care. For some situations, the Do Not Resuscitate Order is appropriate.

 As families some of the best gifts we can give are on this list:

• Talk about the “Remember when…” fun, the trips, the embarrassing moments, school events, jobs, achievements, failures, awards, and friends.
• Talk about the present. We enjoy… We wish for… I appreciate… I forgive… Will you forgive me… I thank you for… I love you… Let’s…
• Discuss the future. Set some goals. Make some plans. Talk about health and illness
• Safely file and tell family members where important documents are kept: bank accounts, insurance policies, deeds to property, loans, social security and medicare numbers, military records, and instructions for caregiving, dying, death, funeral arrangements and burial.
• Include each family member in a special way during festivities.
• Keep decorations simple.
• Prepare food appropriate for dietary needs and in amounts for minimal leftovers.
• Ask for help. If you don’t they will let you do it all.
• Maintain some traditions. Let some of them go as the family changes. Create new ones.
• Instead of gift buying for stuff we don’t need, donate to a favorite charity or provide dinner for a needy family, or invite someone who may be alone.
• Take some time for yourself.
• Participate in a religious service or ritual.

 I hope you have a wonderful holiday season this December 2009

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